9 A few months ago we adopted a puppy. A really big, really goofy puppy. Brutus is just over 100 lbs. and a little more than a year and a half old. As far as we can tell he has never had any real training […]
As a native Floridian I have no real concept of winter. Winter is that thing you see in pictures and in movies and go visit on trips, maybe. I was under the impression that California would be somewhat similar in weather patterns to Florida, with spurts of cold here and there but always reverting back to balmy weather in the end. NOOOPE. It’s cold. Not the ass clenching, mind numbing level of cold the great snowy North East and North West. But cold enough to warrant jackets, sweaters, scarves and gloves a necessity not a fashion suggestion.
As I have mentioned before, the new Bear Den apartment, did not come equip with air conditioning. It did come with heat! I have never in my life had to turn on the heat in an apartment. So when we started having to close all the doors and windows and burrow under 6 blankets to keep warm at night, I realized maybe it was time to give that random nob on the wall a spin. It seems, we did not account for the fact that it probably hasn’t been turned on in 10 months. And that dust is a thing… About four seconds after we cranked the nob over to toasty town, the smoke detectors started to go off.
Que the panic.
I work in the safety field. I have been conditioned over the last three years to associate the sound of fire alarms with evacuations, fire departments and lots of paper work and follow up meetings. I was fairly convinced we were about to reduce the apartment complex to a pile of angry holiday cinders. Not the best way to introduce yourself to your neighbors. We turned the heat off, opened the windows (letting more cold air in) and covered the smoke alarms until the apartment no longer looked the inside of Willy Nelson’s tour bus. I refused to touch the heat again. Our apartment was slowly turning into a Drafty tundra wasteland that is inhabited by a strange race of blanket people. Thankfully, the Bear is braver and smarter than I am. He slowly burned off all of the dust while I was at work one day. Hypothermia is no longer a concern while sleeping! Nor, is waking to a conflagration of dog fur and sadness.
In other news, I was forced to put away all of my Halloween and fall harvest decorations for another year. I had to replace it with the Yule vomit of Christmas trees and Santa hats. I remember having more stuff but I guess a lot of it didn’t make the trip. So I will now have to put pants on and go fight the hordes of angry holiday shoppers to go get more sparkly crap to decorate our den. I am prepared to FA LA LA LAFUCK YOU UP for a discount because paying full price for Styrofoam and glitter is crazy talk.
This will be Coconut’s (a.k.a the stupid cute dog) first Christmas with us. And judging by how she is eyeing the tree, I am going to say her first Christmas ever. Hopefully she doesn’t consider the tree and light up toy like Angel on top a challenge worth accepting. I am pretty sure she watched us decorate the house and was convinced that we just strategically placed toys and things to chew on and destroy all over the house. I have caught her twice trying to snuffle and chew her stocking. I have no idea how she knows that one is her’s, but she is hell bend on destroying it. This would be amusing if it wasn’t attached to the liquor cabinet. Or as like to call it “the gateway to holiday cheer!”.
A few weeks after we got married, my husband and I adopted an 8 year old corgi. They are basically the spokes dogs of the interwebs. And have entire sites like this.. http://corgiaddict.com/ dedicated to them. Looking into their little fox faces and watching them scurry around […]